This is my 4th blog post. And yet another thing thats been on my mind. More religious though.
The Question is: What actually is Hell, If there is one?
I believe there is a Hell, But thats just because of my beleifs. I'm letting you know now that this is not to try to convert any of you or to be to any offense.
I'm in a youth group in St. Andrews Episcopal Church in Ann Arbor. And Hell has been on my mind constantly, and it is very scary when you are a type of christian. I wonder how much the devil has editted my life since then. I've always wondered what Hell was anyway. and One day. (And these are the types of events that I truely beleive there is a god. My questions are answered exactly.) The next day I went to church and the lesson is on Hell. I instantaniously become interested. They brought up some very interesting thing. For example, (this definantly eased most of my spiritual pain, but this is still going on in my mind) they said "What if Hell is not a place where theres demons ripping the limbs off of you are being tortured. But it's simply just a place where your without god." That gave me so much to think about for a long time. If that is true does that mean that Hell has some beautiful plains and skies and looks like earth only without all of the troubles of Earth? That almost made me want to go to hell, I felt ashamed of the thought when I remember that if your able to be with God wouldn't that be a lot better? I mean you would have to find your stuff in Hell even if it wasn't the tortuous place its claimed to be. With god you can simply ask for it because you've earned it. It'd also be a lot more fun and relaxing and everything would be better. But you always have to pay attention and make sure your don't sin. But If your not christian then you don't have to worry about this stuff. So, good for you.
Now Hell has been on my mind for a long time as stated, and its really been a pain. The constant worrying about it and the anti christ symbols flying through my head, and even temptations throughout my life that seem so beneficial. The blood and it just drives me crazy. God has i would like to believe made a lot of it go away recently and all that but if theres stuff like this, Wouldn't there be a devil and it wouldnt be a second lonlier earth? Hell is a very scary and touchy subject, and starting this early in my life with the topic was probably a bad idea. So as I fight the devil (or a demon or whatever) I go along with my life and I try to find a way to get around this. But to all of you non religious people this is all bullshit, but this blog thingie I made was for stuff on my mind so deal with it.
I've had dreams of going to hell. The first one was I was crossing a bridge that was white. there was a huge big entrance with the devil sitting on a chair lounging with the hellish smile while around each side of the wall he was in front of I could see hell and I looked to see hell got scared and said "I'm not ready yet." The devil replied "Ok be generous" as his smile grew. I replied "you too" then afterwards realizing that might have been a mistake seeing that he could be generous enough to save a spot in hell for me.
The second dream I have was I was in front of my friends Ezra and Griff. I killed myself with rope and I woke up in a hall wall with a floating goreing ball with one eye and a mouth and tenticles coming off the side. I ask "Am I in hell?" It replies "Hmm? Oh yeah your in Limbo." So I think little of it. I walk down the hallway to find a door and I go through the door seeing a road a massive open area where the sky and the ground were the same. It was red and has spots of purple fade in and out. There was a crumbling building to the right on teh side of the only road. I decide to walk that way. I see a group of 3 teens talking about something that I couldn't hear. I look forward again and someone in the distance starts running at me yelling my name. I didn't know this person in real life but I knew this person in my dream. I said "what" after they got to me and they asked "What are you doing here?" and I replied "I dunno..." as I look to the ground. They replied "Alright lets go" and we countinue down the road to nowhere.
This is was I have to say about it, tell me what you think like always. Dont fuck up. -Nate
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